the idea of love,

The greatest disease today is not Tb or leprosy: it is being unwanted, unneeded, unloved and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicines, but the only cure for loneliness, despair and hopelessness is love. There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread, but there are many more dying for a little love. - Mother Theresa.

A lot of people ask me what my biggest fears is, or what scares me most. And i know they expect heights, or ghost, or cockroaches, but how do I tell when what I scares most is love- along the fact that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. 

And I said that because I've been there too..

my clingy side he once love,
is now what annoys him most,
questioning the time he won't spare,
my little space he once giggled,
is now mistaken as the sign of abused,
and immaturity,
my sickness,
who need lots of care,
was once the time he would hug and kiss me most,
but now its a burden for him too,

and so, nothing saddens and scares me than the thought that I can become ugly to someone, who once thought all the stars were in my eyes. 

 Now, what is love once again?

Is love a feeling or is love a choice? Most of us will say love is a feelings, but it is not. And if we keep on clinging to that belief- that love is just another feelings, another emotions to deal with, we will never have a lasting relationship.

Because love is always a choice- a conscious commitment. Love is something you choose to work with everyday with a person who has chosen the same thing. And that is why we can't cling on the belief that love is feelings, because feelings are always changing- like the weathers and seasons we had, and we can't build something beautiful that will last on with a shaky foundation. So, love is a choice- a choice of you to commit towards a person which means when things get bad, you would choose to talk than walk away, or when things are falling apart, you would choose to fix it right away.

To the person who is reading this, remember:

Love is not the person who makes your heart flutter, or makes your head spin. Love is not something that can be define in times- the words forever now has been tainted. But love is the person who is always committed in choosing you, than anyone else, love is the person who is dedicated to find something in you to be adored even on the ugliest days.

Love is when one day you can no longer see the stars inside my eyes- when you swore I was your universe, and you choose to look until you find them back. 

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